I am back to writing personal stuff again. I felt so depressed for the last few days with the rejections I got, it felt hard to be talking about it. I only got 5 rejections so far but still they got me harder than I wanted to. And I didn't feel like writing but I am slowly getting back into it. It takes a while to stand up again when you've been kicked in the guts!
Not wanted to discuss about the real stuff, I started listening to music to ease the pain.
There's one composer who always makes it better for me.
Should I still try to introduce him?
He wrote the music for American Beauty, Road to Perdition, Little Women, Angels in America, Love Actually and Pride and Prejudice which I have just discovered very recently.
This is one specific song from the soundtrack that I really love.
From 0 to 1:50 min.
What is with this song that pulls the strings of my heart?
What string is it?
Yes. A disused word. Compassion for everything and everyone. It just pours out of the depth of my chest and just spills over everything which exists on this planet and back into me again.
It leaves me whole and empty.
Full of understanding of the love and wisdom and sadness which it creates in me and the void of it as it occurs and suddenly vanishes away from me.
From 4:19 to 5:27
And there it comes again...like a wave. So powerful it washes everything...leaving me so puzzled, so confused i can barely understand what's just happened.
This time, it is sadness, I know. Why the sadness? I can't be sure.
A thought reaches me: this music is asking me to let go. Of all the emotions. Of the ressentment, and betrayal. And to acknowledge the hurt and the resentment is pain-ful and that's how the sadness emerges.
Thomas Newman, let me say you this once, and once only, you are a genius. Thank you for smoothing things over inside and out.
What about other writers out there? What music inspires you? What tick your boxes? What tickle your heart and soul?